I can only remember one time that the Joker served me cheesesteaks with extra stink clouds at Geno’s.  But that is totally unfair to portray it like something that happens even when the patrons aren’t on shrooms.

Philebrity posted this morning a video from Taiwan that indicates the nation’s disdain for American cities.  And it seems as though our penchant for doing all those terrible things we Philadelphians do on a daily basis has caught us the ire of another foreign country.

Check it out if you want to see in “The Sims”-style animation:

  • A guy in full Phillies gear puking into a trophy for “Worst.”  Not “worst city,” not “worst fans,” just “worst.”  Covers a lot of ground.
  • Preston and Steve throwing up on cheesesteaks.
  • Sports fans holding Santa Claus down and punching him the stomach while a reindeer is is roasted alive on a fire nearby.

So, as you can see, we’ve clearly been busted.  I mean, what did we think was going to happen?  That we could live in this barf-stained paradise forever, free to barf on ourselves and each other and eat each other’s barf and dance around in rain that is also barf forever?  We would have been fools to think so.  Fools with a “ph.”

Even the rolls on which our precious cheesesteaks are served are now refusing to come here.  Without cheesesteaks, what will televised sporting events in Philly cut to as they go to commercial?  What is left in this city?  We are lost; doomed to watch our skyline crumble as the city’s bowels slowly dry up and disintegrate.

Welp.  I better go barf up some lunch.