Every Michael Vick Has His Day

"What's the worst that could happen?" Why do people even ask that anymore? Its like inviting Michael Vick to get busted for a child-fighting ring....

In the midst of blistering the Braves throughout the most weight-bearing series of 2010, Roy Halladay picked up his 20th W, which hasn’t happened since pre-crazy Steve Carlton.  It was also win number two of three against the Braves (Cole Hamels and Roy Oswalt were exceptionally brutal as well), putting a knife in their leg and three more games between the two of us.

But you know all that, because it was on the cover of the Daily News.

And, if you were giving the Daily News a perusal, then you probably noticed the giant Michael Vick eating up a decent chunk of the space, and the headline that was the “joke idea” in the writers’ room before deadline was upon them.

Sure, he may have had a thunderstorming performance against the Detroit Lions, a team who has written itself into NFL folklore as a massive ball of shit that only get bigger as it rolls.  But the thing’s he’s done are undeniable.

The passionate Phillies fans who have been getting in trouble on a continuous loop this season make up a decent portion of the Eagles fanbase, and they all saw what Vick did against the Lions last week and are now willing to suckle his teats like piglets starved for victory.

Sure, he maybe he responsible for the pain and suffering of innocent animals, and it is fair to assume that he’s not the phenom he was before that fiasco, but still…the things he did are undeniable.

There was a Donovan McNabb-shaped hole left in the Eagles’ offense this year, and it was made clear that Kevin Kolb was the shadow of a doubt to fill it.  With him gone for now, they stand at a crossroads not many thought possible a few years ago:  Give the job to the guy who was groomed for it, or give it to the guy who will be good at it?  The true test may be when Vick faces an actual football team.

The fans, however, have decided that ol’ Mikey is just fine.  Keep in mind, however, these are fans who assumed a third place finish this season would be a sign that God exists and his love for the Philadelphia Eagles is higher than that of all other humans in all other uniforms.  So to be able to envision a few steps further toward the promised land in 2010 is a dream Eagles’ fans won’t let go of easily.  If it takes controversy, or wild assumptions regarding the talent of a QB who took some off time to go to prison, then so fucking be it.

Honestly.  This season had the potential to be a festering garbage pile anyway, why not let Vick see what he can do with it?  He’s clearly capable of things Kolb has only seen Spider-Man do, so what’s the worst that could happen?

Why do people even ask that anymore?  Its like inviting Michael Vick to get busted for a child-fighting ring.

So let’s turn to the Flyers, who, instead of hypothetically requiring money from patrons to watch children fight, realistically require money from patrons to let child watch them fight.

Witnessing a savage beat down right before your very eyes can be a maturing experience.  Take Batman.  His parents were murdered two steps in front of him and he went onto become the greatest vigilante detective in the history of comic books.  And there wasn’t even any measure of pleixglass between him and the crime scene.

So what we’re most likely looking at here is the birth of two Philadelphian superhero brothers, destined to spend their adulthood disassembling flash mobs and incinerating crack heads with laser balls.

Flyers Hockey: Where violence breeds masked vigilantes.

They won, by the way.  But who cares.  They hit the blood quota, so the score is all but irrelevant.

But one day soon, the pre-season will end, and the laughter of bloodsport will be replaced by the viciousness of regular season hockey.  This also means, as always, basketball will be right there as well, and with Doug Collins starting off his recent public forum with a Michael Vick joke, clearly things are on the up-and-up.

Man.  Everybody’s got a Vick joke.

Anyway, Sixers are slowly migrating back to this region, though with the bundle of new faces, including Darius Songaila and big ‘ol Craig Brackins just acquired from New Orleans for Willie Green and Jason Smith, they’ll be hard to recognize.

Even harder when Michael Vick will is on the cover of all the Sixers programs.

[Images courtesy of Deadspin]

Read Justin’s other blogs, That Balls Outta Here, and Sports Talk Soup.  He needs your support at his age.